maybe I’m one of the few to admit it but having hundreds of compliments a day telling you how great you look and how amazing you are can be really nice to hear especially when you battle with low self esteem.
suddenly all these faceless Instagram handles are telling you how amazing you are AND IT FEELS GOOD RIGHT?!
It makes you think;
“Hmm maybe my nose I’ve always hated is cute after all!”
“My belly rolls ARE beautiful!”
“You see.. some men do like girls my size!”
And all of this is great if it encourages you to see the things about yourself you have never been able to appreciate.
But when does that become unhealthy, addictive, VALIDATING?
have you ever not gotten as many likes on a picture and automatically made you think you’re ugly?
has someone not said your ass looks good made you doubt whether it is?
has not getting more than your usual likes on a post made you think what you said was stupid or not relevant?
you see there is a very fine line with allowing the kindness of others words to encourage you and to appreciate yourself without giving people the power to take that away as well.
if you give someone the power to hold your validation you are also giving them the power to take it away.
they don’t like your post?
they don’t comment with a compliment?
or maybe worse they do actually insult you.
You have given that person so much power over your validation that you break down when they don’t give it to you.
It’s a horrible feeling isn’t it? not feeling good enough for that person (people) you want to please desperately.
The good news is reclaiming that ‘power’ is something I practice a lot, it helps me so much in situations where people try to belittle my worth - I just think to myself “mmm nope I know myself and I’m hella fly and a good person at that, I’m also a funny bitch” and brush their comment off my shoulder.
Take compliments but do not get sucked in to relying on them to validate your worth, beauty or anything else about yourself.v
